Apu’s World

This one is going to be different sort of a post, in the sense that it’s really not from me. Instead, what I’d like to do is share a reader’s comment and request all of you to respond. Yes, I am specifically asking for comments, since this reader’s note made me feel really sad - all of you reading this, it would be nice if you could take out 2 mins to leave your thoughts. Since my reader, Siranoush has asked for your views, I feel such sharing might be of some help to her.

This is what Siranoush says:

I would like to share some of my story with your readers to see if any of them, feel the same as me. I am a widow, after 55 years; raised multiple children, all college graduates, with their own families and friends now. Most of them, live out of state from me. Since my husband, whom my children adored, passed away almost 4 years ago, most of my children have shown very little interest in me. I suspect it is because I am not needed now and there is very little to hold us together. Their children, my grandchildren, rarely visit me also and, if they come, they immediately go to the television set! This is a negative for me. But, out of every negative, one has to look for a positive–and–the positive for my children, I believe, is, that when I pass on, they will not miss me. You see, how can someone miss someone who is no longer a part of their life!?

I’m sure they love me, but, I really am out of their lives. I am not needed as a baby sitter, so, what am I needed for? Nothing? In the past, if one of my children or grandchildren was hurt or sick, I would immediately go to them–take a plane or whatever. I would always go. They never would ask me. My love for them, would take me there! So–I am always here for them, but, they are not here for me. What do your other readers think about this. I would sincerely like to hear! Thank you.

What are your thoughts for her?

apu In General

Cross-posted on Women’s Web

Until the cut motion in Parliament and the possible fall of the Government upstaged it, it looked as though the saga of Lalit Modi would be ‘breaking news’ on every TV channels worth its salt. Well, one good thing that’s possibly emerged from the IPL hoopla is that cheerleaders may no longer be used at the games. I say ‘possibly’, because the decision isn’t yet clear.

Now, when the cheerleading thing first started 2 years ago, most of the objections that came in were from the perspective that they were ‘against Indian culture.’ By that logic, Rakhi Sawant and the legion of item girls who work in Hindi movies should have been banned a long time ago, but then logic is not the strong suit of Indian politicians.

No, my objection to cheerleading is nothing to do with Indian culture or even with the outfits the cheerleaders wear. It is simply an objection to the whole premise behind the practice of cheerleading, which is that men play, and women cheer. My friend Rashmi, who’s started up this group on Facebook, ‘Say No to Cheerleaders’ explains it very well - so I’m just going to quote her here. She is talking about an exchange she had with her daughter.

Me: “S, do you want to attend the Cricket coaching camp with your brother ?”

S: “Is that where they teach girls to dance when the boys play cricket ?”

And please, don’t point me to the few, token male cheerleaders - we all know what the focus is. (And really, are the male cheerleaders even around anymore?)  Don’t forget the ads in small print that give out a number where you can call and talk to a cheerleader. Is this anything at all to do with cricket or even cricket-as-entertainment? No, just peddling of women.

This is one Western import we don’t need. We have enough sexism of our own, thank you.

apu Women & Feminism

Women’s Web, a new web mag and community for Indian women (the venture I discussed in my last post), is now live! Please do go visit, read and register (in order to participate).

It’s early days yet, so there may be a few glitches - please excuse us for this - the tech team is working hard to address them. Among the articles we’ve put up for launch, I like many (I’m biased of course!), but two of my favourites are this piece on Bollywood’s working women and an interview with Anouradha Bakshi, the founder of Project Why, an organization doing some very good work with the underprivileged.

As I said earlier, I’m excited but nervous too. I do hope those who’ve enjoyed reading this blog will find the site of interest as well.

apu Women & Feminism

Phew, it really has been quite some days since I managed to spend time here. In my defence, I have been busy with a new project that’s been in the wings for some time now (really, in the wings for so long that at times, I’ve despaired of ever getting it off ground). Finally, it does look as if we’ll be able to launch soon, so I can now talk about it here.

So, what is this New Project?

The New Project is a new website/magazine/community for Indian women.

Wait a minute, don’t we have some of those already?

Sure, but I do think there is space for more quality original content  - and without raining on anyone else’s parade, I’d like to say that at times, I feel as if the content specifically targeted at women is overwhelmingly about beauty, weight loss or celebrity gossip. Surely we are interested in more than these?

One thing which has amazed me for, for instance, is that, given how more and more women are entering the paid workplace, why is there so little focus on that?

So, one of the objectives of this new website is that a good part of the content is geared to working women. Now, by working women, I don’t necessarily mean someone who has a 9 to 6 job in a shiny office. Working women could be full-time workers, part-time workers, work-from-home moms, the self-employed, retired workers or - it could even be someone who is right now on a break, but would like to keep in touch, or, someone who’s never worked outside the home but wants to start. And who is to say homemakers don’t want to discuss many of these things too? (Not to mention that most women’s magazines in India also have a significant percentage of male readers).

The idea is to have interesting and intelligent content for women - feature articles on current topics, profiles of women who’ve done interesting things, a Q&A session with industry experts plus I’ve got some really cool bloggers who’ll be writing on the site. Other sections such as a forum and newsletter should follow soon, though the plan is to start small and grow with our readers.

It’s not a solely feminist website, in the sense that the content is not structured around activism and what we usually call ‘women’s issues’, but on the other hand, while it is going to be a commercial website, I do visualize it as a women-friendly space with two important values : to be supportive of women and their choices, and to talk to women as intelligent users.

Getting the site development through has been a huge challenge, considering that I don’t have a technology background myself; while things can always improve, it looks like we’ll be ready to go with Version 1.0 in a day or two, and I’ll announce the url here then.

I’m looking forward to support and encouragement from you folks, my dear blog readers - and of course, feel free to offer suggestions once you’ve had a look at the site. I hope to continue blogging here (and regularly), although I may use some posts at both locations.

apu Women & Feminism

Still busy-busy and all that, but another interesting thing I can point you at. Via the Caferati mailings, got news of what seems to be an event worth attending:

Swedish Crime Fiction

– The Renewal And Redefining Of A Literary Genre.

Readings by two Swedish crime fiction writers:

Håkan Nesser, author of the internationally bestselling series about Chief Inspector Van Veeteren, that include titles such as The Mind’s Eye, Borkmann’s Point, and Woman with Birthmark (Pan Macmillan);

Together with Zac O’Yeah, author of the forthcoming Once Upon A Time In Scandinavistan (Hachette India).

The readings will be followed by a unique panel discussion on modern crime fiction, featuring Sudarshan Purohit, Literary Critic and Translator of Surender Mohan Pathak’s bestselling Hindi novels The 65 Lakh Heist and Daylight Robbery (Blaft Publications), as a moderating panelist.

If any Bengaloorian readers of this blog are planning to attend, drop me a note if you feel like it - I should be there.

apu The Literary life