The Cloud of Class
June 22nd, 2009
Nita discusses how the cloud of class hovers over our assessment of a crime; she also dispels the myth that rape is about inability to control one’s sexual urges.
It was clear that she had no idea of what the crime of rape actually signifies. That often its not about wanting sex. But violence. Rape is often about someone wanting another, at any cost, even if it means that the victim is unwilling. In fact the unwillingness often plays an important part in the wanting. Why can’t I have her…too? Or how dare she refuse me?
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I agree rape is about power and aggression, and that is why all the blaming the victim’s lifestyle, clothing and timing is so wrong.
so true. yesterday i was heartened to see this college principal on TV - a girl in that college had been raped - and he said categorically that they would do everything to help her revert to her usual life, and that it was not her fault. rare to hear people in positions of authority say that.
What does a victim deserve? Judgment? Sympathy? And some blame?
What does a criminal deserve? Punishment? Condemnation? All the blame?
What makes rape different from other violent crimes? Is it something about the society’s conception of virginity or the victim’s vulnerability?
Sri - I don’t know why the victim deserves any blame; the criminal deserves punishment as per the laws of the land in a reasonable time frame. In this sense, I don’t think rape is different from any other crime. Society does however view a rape victim as ‘tarnished’ in some manner, perhaps because of our views on virginity.
I have the utmost sympathy for all victims, regardless of the crime, But, I will not mince words. The world is a big, bad place. Much as I would like to say, it is every woman’s right to freedom to go where she wants, and do what she pleases, unfortunately, our world is far from ideal and, ultimately the onus for her own safety still falls on her. There is no police force, or judicial system that can prevent every crime. I’m not insensitive, quite the opposite. No one knows how destiny chooses its victims and criminals. I have resigned myself to this view on fairness and crime in the world…because I see it every day. So, you may not approve of this, because its an “infringement” on women’s freedom, but the surest way to prevent this crime is to mandate significantly more self-defence lessons for girls while in school. If you drop sugar on the floor, the ants will get to it, and you will have to disperse them by force. Swimming in the ocean is perhaps more enjoyable than walking on the beach, but if you do, you also have to be ready for a shark attack. If a truck hits a motorbike or the bike hits the truck, the consequences arent too different, the only thing that matters in the end is if there was a helmet on.The word “blame” is hard to understand or use, but I will only say that nothing is 100% black or white, its always shades of grey. I dont condone any crime or violence or aggression, and I certainly dont think that some women “ask” for it, but lets face it, there is a price for some freedoms in our world. Some freedoms come with dangers. Sad but true.
Sri, this comment is so wrong on many levels - starting with the simple fact that most women are not raped (or assaulted) because of carelessness. Many, many assaults happen at home/with known people. Your comment was actually very, very upsetting to read because I’d think that someone like you would know better. It is not about the price for freedom. This piece will explain it much, much better than I can:
http://finallyfeminism101.wordpress.com/2007/03/15/faq-what’s-wrong-with-suggesting-that-women-take-precautions-to-prevent-being-raped/
You can certainly disagree with me, Apu, but I am not sure you can say my comments are “wrong”. Clearly, we think differently. I will not say much more.
Little babies are raped. This itself should point to the fact that these criminals should be behind bars. Perhaps then we women should stop being born. But wait, that won’t stop rape. Now most rapes are on women. If women are stopped from being born, it will be the men who are raped.